Internalization
by C.S. Isui
Summary: Sasuke gets a visit from someone very special. Its not much of a visit, but it shook Sasuke to his very core.


This is my share of how I AM FREAKING EXCITED ON HOW MY ULTIMATE OTP BECAME FUCKING CANON! Yeah, I've followed this pairing for 6 years and my fate never wavered that Sakura and Sasuke would be together in the end. I've always believed that Sakura wasn't created by Kishi-sensei to be useless (so much as the haters call her.) I mean, Naruto was the hero of the series. Sasuke was created to be his rival… And according to my research, Sasuke was named after a character named Sasuke Sarutobi who had a partner named Sakura. So I guess SasuSaku was already predetermined. And besides, what's the purpose of Sakura being so in-love with Sasuke? A good author knows how to make ends meet but a great author knows how to give all the characters a purpose, no matter how minor they are.

I would like to congratulate Masashi Kishimoto-sensei on his great success with Naruto. I'm happy to say that his series had a great impact in making my teenage years happy, despite my personal hardships. His writings gave my afternoons excitement. Im proud to be one of the many that Kishi-sensei touched by his work.

Enough of my chatter, this story happens while Sasuke is travelling in his road of redemption. BTW, my favorite character is here. 3

~:-)~

Internalization

It would seem that Sasuke spends most his time helping anyone who needed his help. His travels in these past two years have shown how much the shinobi world evolved from being chaotic to peaceful and united. Although, it also showed him that the world was faster in moving on than he was. People, although still reluctant to approach, welcomed him to their respective villages and accepted his help in rebuilding their infrastructures. Even several key figures like the Raikage acknowledged him in a positive light. But Sasuke was still shadowed by an insecurity that kept reminding him of the wrong choices he had made in his life.

_Do I deserve this? _He would often ask himself. He punched himself internally. No, he doesn't; not after all he had done to the world. No, deserved to die, like a criminal should be treated. He was a criminal, publicly redeemed because of his acts during the 4th Shinobi War. He shouldn't be exalted as a hero with Naruto. He shouldn't be acknowledged by his former sensei- now Hokage, Kakashi and most of all, he shouldn't be forgiven by Sakura. They should be disgusted at him. They should avoid him, even. He didn't deserve all this kindness, he didn't deserve forgiveness. Not anyone and especially not from them. He failed to see that he had a family in team 7. He failed to see how Kakashi became his somewhat father-figure who tried so hard to direct him to the light. He failed to see how Naruto became his brother who wanted show the best in both of them. Most of all, he failed to see Sakura. He can't call her a sister, no; calling Sakura a sister seemed so wrong. She was special but he couldn't pin-point how. To the team, it was undeniable that she was a serene, cool light that gave comfort to their troubled minds, a source of hope and peacefulness; despite the fact that she tends to get really violent at times. But to him, it was a mystery. It's what made her so annoying. Sasuke, even as a child was quick in reading people. Sakura, although open with her emotions, was an enigma to Sasuke. She was so transparent that he found it hard to see her clearly. _Or maybe I was only too stubborn to see, _came a thought. He dismissed his thoughts of Konoha, or _home._ It was hard to call that place home. All fond memories there had been wiped clean by his actions.

Sasuke found a nice place in a clearing in the woods to camp. Using his Katon, he started a warm fire and began to cook the rabbit he had caught earlier. It had been quite an uneventful day. The most he did was help a few farmers carry the day's harvest while passing by a small village just outside of Amegakure. One of the farmers he had helped offered him some onigiri to take along with him. Sasuke refused, of course, but the old man insisted; eventually, Sasuke agreed. He ate the onigiri with the roasted rabbit in silence. The music of the crickets, the crackling of the fire and the rustling of the leaves were the only sounds present around Sasuke. He liked it that way, the silence. It gave him an ambiance that enabled him to concentrate on his thoughts. This travelling thing he delegated upon himself was not just to see the world with a clear vision but he also needed to get away from everything that he wasn't prepared to face. Yes, it was cowardly but he saw no other way to approach the circumstances. For the first time ever, Sasuke didn't know what to do. He was no longer an Avenger, as had called himself before. Sasuke felt empty, he had no lingering purpose was nothing to drive him to push forward and improve.

_"That's not true." _

Sasuke turned to see a figure in a nearby tree. It was a figure of a man wearing a cloak. _"You still haven't changed, my foolish otooto." _Sasuke heard a playful chuckle coming from the figure. It moved towards him and his nii-san, Itachi came into view. Sasuke's eyes grew big at the impossible sight. _"Don't look so surprised."_ Said his brother as he poked the fire. _"You look as if you don't want to see me." _Sasuke still can't believe what he was seeing. He glanced at the half finished onigiri in his hand. _"That onigiri is innocent, Sasuke. The old man was just thankful." _Sasuke had to blink twice, no, thrice to believe what he was seeing. He opened his mouth to speak but was stopped by Itachi. _"I know it's selfish of me but can I do all the talking again?" _Sasuke only nodded. He had a lot of things to tell his nii-san but he didn't know where to start. _"First of all, you don't deserve the kindness of other people."_ Itachi started. Sasuke only looked down. He knew his nii-san was right. He deserved worse. _"You don't deserve to be forgiven and you don't deserve to be loved." _Itachi's words made Sasuke feel even worse than before. Reality was really a bitch. _"Do you know, why, otooto?" _ Sasuke opened his mouth to answer but was again stopped. _"Sasuke, you are young and alive. You may be one arm less but you, being such a talented shinobi can achieve great things." _ Itachi looked straight at his otooto's mismatched eyes and smiled a warm smile. _"You don't deserve the kindness of other because you are being too harsh on yourself. You don't deserve the forgiveness of others because you yourself can't forgive in return and you don't deserve the love of others because you haven't learned to love yourself." _Sasuke was inhaling every word Itachi was saying. He never looked at the situation that way. It's amazing that even in the afterlife; Itachi never stopped guiding his precious otooto. _"That's some team you have back in Konoha." _ A shadow of amusement laced Itachi's words. It was as if he was teasing Sasuke. _"Team 7, who would have thought. A rag-tag team of a fangirl-turned-medic, an idiot jinchuriki, a perverted sensei and my foolish otooto saved the world. Really, who would have thought?" _Itachi looked up at the sky, the fire casting a lonely shadow in his tired features. A smile crept upon his lips and continued speaking. _"I always knew Naruto would be like a brother to you. The two of you always argued like brothers after all. You are also very fortunate to have Kakashi as a I recall, he was very distant and quiet, much like yourself, but he has a kind heart. Now, SAKURA…" _Itachi smirked when he mentioned her. Sasuke glared at his brother. Why did he need to bring her up? _"Embarrassed just by hearing her name, huh?" _Itachi chuckled. _"She is cute." _Sasuke glared even more at the man beside him. Itachi only chuckled some more at how his otooto reacted to his words. Sakura was a touchy subject, he already knew that. But this touchy? It would seem his otooto had got it bad. _"Tell me, when you were younger and had missions with them, did you peek at her?" _Itachi could see his otooto's ears get red. Sasuke glared at Itachi even more "What made you think that?! Im not perverted like the dobe!" Sasuke replied. Itachi only laughed. _"But did you ever think of peeking? Or even wonder what she looked like?" _Itachi knew he was pushing it but it was fun to see his little brother so flustered. Sasuke was turning redder now. He wanted Itachi to stop taking about Sakura at such a controversial fashion. He knew he was being foolish but he didn't like it. _"Take good care of her, Sasuke. You may try to suppress it, but I know that you know that you treasure Haruno Sakura more than anything."_ Sasuke's eyes once again became wide at his brother's words_. "I envy you, Sasuke. We both know that Sakura deserves to have a man who would make her happy, give her a wonderful family and love her with all his heart. But despite that reality, she still continues to work hard to do what's best for you. Sasuke, you have learned from Naruto that people get second chances. He showed you that kindness isn't always in the form of soft gestures and gentles words. Kindness comes in many forms, like the punches of a brother. Kakashi was a man who found it hard to forgive his father but he learned how to forgive because he became a father to both you and Naruto. You have learned to forgive through Kakashi's silent guidance. Now, learn from this girl who waits for you with faithfulness, reverence and love. Learn how to love from Sakura. Learn how to love with the gentleness of the sakura blossom during spring. Learn to love with acceptance and understanding, not anger."_ Sasuke faced his brother and saw pride shining in his nii-san's eyes. _"I look at you and I see a bright future. I have faith in you, my dear otooto."_ Itachi poked Sasuke's forehead. _"Don't be foolish this time. Don't let a good girl get away."_ Itachi can see Sasuke's face get flustered once again. _"Besides… you need to put those Uchicha family jewels to good use."_ Itachi laughed as Sasuke's face became as red as a tomato and had a glare that Uchiha Madara would be envious of. The scent of something burning reached Sasuke's nose and with a start, he opened his eyes. Sasuke had been dreaming. He removed the burnt remains of the rabbit off the spit and looked at midnight sky.

"Really, nii-san. You are as annoying as Sakura."


End file.
